How to get a woman for anal sex

To begin with, you need to admit that either your partner likes it and it goes completely on its own, or it's a long-distance race with a lot of incentives and negotiations. This article is about the much more common variant - your partner refuses anal sex.

Despite the fact that nowadays it is standard for a man to satisfy a woman and for a woman to try to give a man the pleasure that porn actresses give porn actors, anal sex is not a common thing among couples. Yes, 60% women and 90% men have tried anal sex. But trying something and doing something are two very different things in anal sex. No more than 20% heterosexual couples have anal sex relatively regularly, at least once a month, and no more than 10% heterosexual couples have anal sex really regularly, i.e. on average once a week.

Most often, it is recommended that a man should not talk about it. He should try it regularly and wait for the right moment when his partner allows it. Actually, cheat on her a little. For me (20 years of experience with two long-term partners who refuse anal sex), this did not work. The partners usually clearly opposed it and this way you would end up in the position of a supplicant who does not respect the will of your partner. This is never a good situation :), but it does not work either.

There is no universal or miracle method of persuasion to anal sex. Rather, a combination of the stimuli and methods described below. It takes a lot of diligence and it's not for everyone. Most guys don't have the energy for it and are happy with just mouth and vagina or even without :).

Accept the status of unnatural, unclean and exceptional practices

Some people, about 40% men and most women, perceive anal sex as something unnatural and unclean. There is little point in refuting this. Such a perception is essentially objective. Even though some species of monkeys sometimes engage in anal sex, it is not a natural or preferred form of sex for them either. There is certainly more mess during anal sex than during vaginal or oral sex. Statistical and social arguments will be clearly against anal sex. It is better to accept anal sex as a slightly dirty and above-standard sexual practice. Nor does presenting friends as the standard help. Quite the opposite - regular anal sex is not the standard. For every couple of friends who practice anal sex, there are 10 who do not.

You can't argue on health grounds. Anal sex can prevent and treat minor haemorrhoids, but can cause urinary tract inflammation if hygiene is lacking. More about the positives and negatives of anal sex will tell you great article about anal sex.

Your own example – teasing a man's anus – doesn't help.

In addition to some 5-10% gay men, there may be another 20-30% heterosexual men who enjoy teasing the male anus. When masturbating or by a woman (pegging). However, these men do not have a significant advantage over men who reject their own (passive) anal. This is because women who reject anal perceive such men as sex maniacs and do not believe that anal sex can or should be pleasurable for a normal decent woman.

Paying for anal sex – a very effective strategy

Offering and, above all, actually paying your wife or girlfriend money for anal sex is highly effective. It's not just about the money itself, which will eventually stay in the family more or less. Offering your wife money for a certain sexual practice will show her that you value that sexual practice extremely highly. It will excite and flatter her. It has many other positive effects. The woman will realize that she is there to fulfill your wishes because you fulfill her wishes. It can also corrupt her in a good way. Sometimes she will have sex with you for free to please you, even though she herself may not want to at that moment. It's just a step away from doing something similar with anal.

Paid sex also sets aside the rules of morality. It is not a standard, but an extreme, where more is allowed. In the woman's mind, even the "indecent dirty" anal sex is subsequently allowed. The actual payment of money - closing the deal, is important, at least for the first few months. The woman realizes that it is not a game, but that it is really very important to you. In our country, it actually opened up anal sex. However, it was still an exceptional event once a fortnight and it remained that way for several years even after the abolition of paying for anal sex.

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Attractiveness

Attractiveness in the context of anal sex – above-standard sexual practice – cannot be assessed by conventional standards. For 90% women, excessive money or a good figure in a man are not essential. How do I know? It's simple. Only 10% men and less have relatively large amounts of money and only 10% men aged 35 and over do not have a big belly. But if you want something extra – anal sex, you yourself need to offer something extra.

Not many people get to the big money. Let's leave that aside.

But you can exercise. Losing belly fat and strengthening your muscles is easy said, but harder to do. Especially at the age of 40, when you have a lot of other responsibilities. But it's worth it. Not only for anal sex, but also for your health and self-confidence. So it's not such a sacrifice. And ask yourself - how many of your friends and colleagues aged 35-50 don't have a belly button bigger than a model or athlete? Maybe 10%. Yes, that's exactly the number of couples who regularly practice anal sex...

Know how to talk to women. You either have it in you or it comes with age and experience. Unfortunately, television gives us men very bad instructions when it comes to flirting with women. A hard-working moron, a wannabe easy-going friend, an unavailable tough guy or a charming elegant man. A modern man should express interest (be careful not to confuse it with a confession - that's really unnecessary nonsense forcing a woman to commit), have fun while doing so and not expect more from a woman than to laugh together. That is, no "debt" for effort, commitment, etc. And also not be afraid of messing something up and experimenting sometimes, pushing a woman a little.

If you maintain your body and know how to talk to women, you will be more physically pleasing and entertaining to your wife. You will more easily entice her to engage in above-standard sexual intimacy. Furthermore, other women will be interested in you, at least in communicating with you. This excites and unsettles your wife at the same time and creates pressure for her to perform above-standard.

For more see article What women want in men

The uniqueness and ego of a woman

You can play a lot that you don't want an average woman. But an exceptional woman who provides her man with exceptional service like a porn actress. Similarly, today a loser is a man who doesn't make a woman orgasm :). Although the (silent) majority of couples regularly function without a female orgasm. This method works quite well, but rather as a support in combination with other methods. And it has one more disadvantage. If you demand an exceptional woman, you should offer something exceptional yourself.

BDSM play and sex role play

BDSM games enhance submissiveness and dominance and sometimes even hurt. They teach a woman that a little pain, such as she feels during anal sex, is not detrimental to pleasure. Unlike anal, it usually does not require any special effort. Painless games for enhancing submissiveness and dominance can have a similar effect. Such sex games will show that one is sometimes to the pleasure of the other and vice versa.

Trading – Not only giving, but also taking

This method works very well, perhaps best of all, but only after many years of relationship. And it really must be your wife's great desire. If you have something your wife extremely wants, and you don't want to give it to her just for love.

I can't judge how common or exceptional this situation is. But if you have it, it works extremely well. My wife wants fidelity. She doesn't need 99% fidelity with her heart, time, money (to be exact, I was naughty about once every six months (more like once a year). For the sake of completeness, I'll add that my wife always had absolute freedom. I would also like it if she had someone else sometimes. But she doesn't even want to hear about it. My wife says I'm a sexual slob. It's true, I'm an animal. I tell her: "You're a slob too. You know I don't care about money or things, but freedom is very important to me. You have 99% me and you want 100%. If I have to be like a slave in a cage, you'll pay, you'll pay a lot." I lost my freedom, but anal sex is no longer an exceptional event for a reward.

In time, such waves will subside. The stronger partner, the one who gives more (I'm not talking about money at all), will eventually learn to take in a balanced way and the weaker partner will learn to give more. If the stronger partner takes too little, he gets frustrated and the weaker partner doesn't appreciate him. At worse, he takes too much. Usually one of the couple always gives more than they take. There is no need to completely balance it out. However, severely imbalanced situations will kill the relationship.

Try 2 weeks before menstruation – a woman is at her sexual peak

A woman is most in the mood in the middle of her menstrual cycle. Let's say 14 days before her period. This sounds like a fairy tale or a scientific finding of dubious validity. Sexual stimulants don't work for me and my wife, but this really works. And I think it works for everyone.

Be prepared

While vaginal and oral sex do not require as much preparation and experience, anal intercourse is more demanding and it is advisable to read something about it and ideally try it on yourself first. You also need to choose suitable sexual lubricantmost gels are unsuitable for anal sex, including gels designed specifically for anal sex. Smaller amounts of anal anal lubricants can also help you get started. anal plug and for advanced users it will add a strong excitement quality dildo. More about anal sex in our article Anal sex, enema, extreme anal practices and in the article Anal Lubricant Cream Test.

What you will be dealing with

You'll be pushing a woman into something she doesn't want. You'll actually be a beggar, blackmailer or trader and that's partly how you'll be perceived by the friends you talk to about it. Your wife will tell you not to talk about it all the time. She'll be more afraid of it then. That doesn't work very well. The longer you don't have it, the more you bring it up in your speech.

Most of you will be wondering, should we give up anal sex? Being a good, selfless husband or boyfriend. That's your decision. I've never asked myself that question. Either I'm selfish or I've given a lot. That's another story, and a long one. For me, it has always been about not being discouraged by the above. Just like your wife wants you to be faithful and constantly checks up on you. Or your wife has other desires and makes you feel those desires more often than you would like or than your capabilities. In love, you simply have to give but also take. Otherwise, it doesn't end well.

Your opinion

Share your opinion or experience. We are interested in what feminists would say about this. Although it does not seem so from the article, movements in support of women's rights are sympathetic. Including positive discrimination against women with the aim of balancing natural discrimination. These are not exaggerated woke movements such as the sometimes hysterical support for LGBT on Netflix. Women's rights movements do useful things for society. For example, Me Too or the right to breastfeed in public in Europe, the right to drive a car in Saudi Arabia or many lesser-known projects.

JUDr. Ing. Vladimír Koranda, Ph.D.